Chetan's Article: For Indian Women

Alright, this is not cool at all..

A recent survey by Nielsen has revealed that Indian women are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic alone has caused me to stress out. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed.

What are we doing to our women? I'm biased, but Indian women are the most beautiful in the world. As mothers, sisters, daughters, colleagues, wive and girlfriends - we love them. Can you imagine life without the ladies?

For now, i want to give Indian women five suggestions to reduce their stress levels.

One, don't ever think you are without power. Give it back to that mother-in-law. Be who you are, not someone she wished you would be. She doesn't like you? That's her problem.

Two, if you are doing a good job at work and your boss doesn't value you - tell him that, or quit. Talented, hard-working people are much in demand.

Three, educate yourself, learn skills, network - figure out ways to be economically independent. So next time your husband tells you that you are not a good enough wife, mother or daughter-in-law, you can tell him to take a hike.

Four, do not ever feel stressed about having a dual responsibility of family and work. It is difficult, but not impossible. The trick is not to expect an A+ in every aspect of your life. You are not taking an exam, and you frankly can't score cent per cent (unless you are in SRCC, of course). It is okay if you don't make four dishes for lunch, one can fill their stomach with one. It is okay if you don't work until midnight and don't get a promotion. Nobody remembers his or her job designation on his or her dying day.

Five, most important, don't get competitive with other women. Someone will make a better scrapbook for her school project than you. Another will lose more weight with a better diet. Your neighbour may make a six-dabba tiffin for her husband, you don't - big deal. Do your best, but don't keep looking out for the report card, and definitely don't expect to top the class. There is no ideal woman in this world, and if you strive to become one, there will be only one thing you will achieve for certain - stress.

So breathe, chill, relax. Tell yourself you are beautiful, do your best and deserve a peaceful life. Anybody trying to take that away from you is making a mistake, not you. Your purpose of coming to this earth is not to please everyone. Your purpose is to offer what you have to the world, and have a good life in return. The next time this survey comes, I don't want to see Indian women on top of the list. I want them to be the happiest women in the world. Now smile, before your mother-in-law shouts at you for wasting your time reading the newspaper.

Awesome Proposal

So I decided that I'd ask her to marry me.
Or ask her if she would marry me.
Or say that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.
Or tell her I loved her, and that I wanted her to be with me forever.
Or give her a ring -- a big, huge diamond ring.
Or just get down on my knees and let my eyes say it all.

Well, I had reached a decision. What exactly I was going to do about it, I didn't know -- at least not yet.

It's now exactly three year since the first time I had started talking with her-- an anniversary of sorts. I remembered, because that first time was Christmas.

And tomorrow it's Christmas again, the third time. And we had become intimate close friends.
And I had fallen in love.. with her..

And since I am a simple-minded sort of guy, I have decided I want to marry her.
But How to tell her, though, was a bit of a problem.
There were so many ways to do it and choosing the right one wasn't easy. And I had no idea how she'd react.
Would she think I was moving fast?
Was it too early to suggest marriage?
Was she even interested in me in that way?
Surely, the best way to find out was to tell her how I felt, and ask her if she felt the same.
And if she did, then we could get married. Right?
These thoughts had been in my head from the moment I had woken up that morning. And I'd only been awake a few minutes. As I finished brushing my teeth, the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hi!" It was her.

The sound of her cheery voice took my breath away. "Hi!" I replied, almost whispering.

"Listen," she said, sounding very excited. "I'm having a party at home tonight. Be there at eight."

"Sure," I replied.

"Ok, bye!" And she put the phone down.

I stood there for almost a minute, staring at the phone in my hand. And then I stupidly said "Bye" to it.

I would have to reach the party early, to tell her in private. Or should I say it right there in front of all the guests? Or after the party, when we were cleaning up after everyone was gone?

And what was I going to get her? Should I get her anything at all? How about flowers? Roses? Or was that too clichéd?
Orchids sounded better.
Or bluebells.
Or tulips.
Or cauliflower.

I checked my thoughts. No. Not cauliflower.

It's Christmas. A gift was definitely in order.
I could get her that moonstone pendant she liked so much.
But then it was a little flimsy as a gift.
It was really a toy more than a piece of jewellery.
But did it matter if she really liked it?

Should I get her a book instead?
Or a CD?
Or an earring?
Or should I make her something?
I thought about my artistic skills and decided that that was probably not a good idea.

I spent so much time looking for a suitable gift all day that by the time I decided that flowers would be a better option, all the florists had closed. And it was also too late to try to get to her house early and catch her alone.

So I decided I'd tell her after the party when everyone was gone. And that I wouldn't get her anything -- more because I couldn't, than anything else.

Feeling like a fool, and extremely nervous, I reached her doorstep. I was on time, but there didn't seem to be any noise coming from inside. Maybe no one had turned up yet. After all, who came to a party on time?

I stood there and composed myself for a minute.
Then, reasonably confident that the turmoil I was going through wouldn't show, I knocked.

She opened the door, but only a fraction.
She slid out without opening the door completely, handed me a piece of cloth, and told me to tie it around my eyes. "We're playing Blind Man's Buff," she said.

Meekly, I put the blindfold on, and she led me into the house. There was silence, and no one was making a sound. Quite sneaky of everyone, I thought to myself.

She spun me around a little, and then made me stop.
She backed away, and then said from somewhere behind me, "Ok, you can take it off now."

Though a little confused as to what version of Blind Man's Buff was played after taking the blindfold off, I complied.

And as soon as I opened my eyes, I froze.

I was standing in the middle of her empty living room, and the lights had all been turned off.
But the room was brightly lit with dozens of candles.

And on the wall in front of me, was a big poster with the following words on it:

Three years ago, this day we met.

There was an arrow pointing to the right, beside the poster.
So I turned. On the next wall were the words:

One year of friendship..
One year of friendship and joy..
One year of friendship and joy and intimacy..

Three full years.. between a girl and a boy..

One year of care..
One year of care and comfort..
One year of care and comfort and closeness..

Three full years.. between a girl and a boy..

On the third wall, was:

One year of love and more fear..
One year of more love and more fear..
One year of.. just more love..

Three years or Six,
a lifetime it seems,
And yet, it feels just like yesterday..

But I have waited long enough to tell you..

I turned to look at the fourth wall, and there, standing in front of
it, was she, holding up a poster in her hands that said:

I want to be this happy forever.. Will You Marry Me?