Why?

I don't understand why..

it hurts..
To close my eyes and lie on my back..
it pains..
To listen to music..
it troubles..
To stay awake in the night..
it suffocates..
To see your name anywhere..
it pricks..
To walk alone in the rain..

I don't understand why..

I search for words to explain..
How I feel without you..
why..
I always look for something..
That reminds me of you..
why..
I check the calendar to count..
The number of days left to meet you..
why..
I break down everytime I see..
The messages sent by you..

I never knew..
Loneliness was so cruel..
I never knew..
Loving was so painful..
.
.
.
I never knew..
I loved you so much..